Ailaaa! आप तो यहाँ सचमुच आ गए!


Addicted? Accept it. Fight it. Get over it damn it!

The dictionary meaning of this word is "being abnormally tolerant to and dependent on something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming"
. In rather simple words, it means an abnormally strong craving.

Ok, full marks for that. So what? We all know what it means. Why am I preaching then?

Well, I am simply laying my thoughts out of experience here!

Being committed to something is like an addiction. Be it to drugs, alcohol, internet, work or even people. But there's a slight difference between being 'attached' and 'addicted'. You don't get addicted to everything you are attached to. But yes, you are attached to things you are addicted to.
It takes a while to realize that this habitual dependency on something/someone is rather more serious than mere attachment . The moment of realization occurs when this habit is suddenly cut-off without prior notice and you become restless. Sometimes your brain functions only the way you want to, ignoring the after effects. So here, you start getting withdrawal symptoms. And trust me, they can make your life hell. You start regretting. You start thinking why the hell did you even get addicted to something so unworthy. Yes, you finally accept you are an addict. Someone who is so ardently devoted to something that life without it becomes completely impossible. This abrupt deprivation of the substance produces certain negative energy making you weak; psychologically, physically and emotionally.

You feel hopeless without it.

You feel useless in this world suddenly.

You feel like giving up on life.

You feel like a fool to have been involved in it.
You feel compulsively restless.

You feel helpless like never before.

You feel your core existence is so meaningless.

You want it back. And quicker than ASAP! Gosh, how do I deal with this? Why did I get into it at the first place? Where is the CTRL + Z button when u need it? Or SHIFT + DELETE would be an even better option. I didn't know I was running behind a hypnotizing vicious circle. Your mind is blocked. Everything is blank. You see no future and you don't want to remember the past. You are compelled to heal in the present but you want to run away. The horizon seems farther, the sky looks wider and you can literally count every second of life. Time just doesn't seem to pass. Addiction is a chronic, relapsing disease which traps your mind and controls it. Because it was omnipresent. The more you try running away, the more you crave for it, unknowingly.
The very thought of being away from that one dear thing you thought gave you energy and purpose to live gives you shiver. But heck o' life, how can I just cease my contact with it, when I thrived on it for so long?

Every problem has solution. It may not be the simplest treatment but then who says life is an easy cup of cake? In reality you cannot have it unless you make an effort. At every step of life you have to prove yourself. Sometimes to your family, to your boss or to your dear one. Can't you, for a change prove yourself; for yourself?? Think about the mind which has been dedicated to you since you came in this world. Think of the organs which helped you live every moment. Think of the tiny little heart which made your days all throughout. For a change be selfish and just think about yourself. You will eventually find the 'one' way of fighting this addiction.

I am still searching for mine. My waiting eyes are drooping, tired and watery but haven't given up. One day will come, and this too shall pass.

I will conquer.........................................................................................


Anonymous said...

Hey, you tagged me in This.. :) Take care, hope you are alright!

curry said...

umm..tagged u?? anyway, am fine mr/miss anon :) :)