Living in a city can be tough.
No, I am not talking about the cement jungle, claustrophobic atmosphere, overflowing crowd and the endless traffic.
And of course there is work stress, lot of responsibilities, family problems, social formalities and basically no time for yourself. But what actually makes me sad above all of this, is the fact that people have become superficial here.
Knowingly or unknowingly, they have become very calculative, overtly practical and are not that sensitive anymore.
They think from their minds, not their hearts. I prefer thinking from my heart. But even I fail to do so these days.
So what is the issue? Why has the world become so virtual? Why is nobody emotionally available for you? Remember the last time you were with your building friends on terrace talking and laughing out so loudly, that the neighbours actually came up to complain? Yes, that exact time of innocence. When you didn't know where your life was heading, you hadn't completed your class assignment, your only priority was how to ask out that 'special' friend for a cup of chai and dosa at the cheapest udipi and not an expensive coffee shop. While these days, you just use the word 'LOL' while chatting with the same friends, who are just a block away. We have replaced actual Hahaha with ':)', 'lol' and other such emotionless expressions. Don't say you grew up/grew old because that's a lame reason and everybody grows old. Aging is inevitable but growing up is up to you.
BBM and Whatsapp have become the way of life for so called 'Being-in-Touch'. Everything we do is for that one picture and update on our FB profile, for the world to know how happy we are. And instead of talking it out with your sibling/friend/partner, you discuss your personal problems and complaints on Twitter. Just to show you're social and not left out. You prefer your smart phone to your book in the night. You expect your partner to share all the secrets and basically leave nothing untold, but you hesitate to keep your cell phone lying around your partner/best friend/family.
We are so caught up in catching up with the pace of city life, that there is no time left to enjoy the house we buy on loan, the good food we skip for work, that dinner with friends at home and not a fancy restaurant and the time when you played cards with your family with a glass of Thums Up the whole of Sunday. These days, you want to spend your weekends splurging endlessly in stupid malls, go out for drinks with only your colleagues (as if you weren't already spending 15 hours a day with them), or ruining your Sundays by sulking about the coming Monday.
And most importantly, we have no time for love. Love is crying somewhere around a corner looking at our present situation. The priority of love is lost somewhere so much that we don't even realise it's importance anymore. Yes, at the back of our minds we want all of it. Money, Fame, Love, Family, Health and Happiness. But somehow, money just wins, taking away all the glory. What we ignore the most is love and health, which actually are the base for ultimate happiness. Isn't it? And why? Because once you find true love, you never talk about finding someone else. You don't think of other options, for what if it doesn't work out. In fact you don't even want to think that it won't work out. Whereas in case of money, once you find it, you will still want more. You would still want more options to earn it. And still, you'll never be completely satisfied.
Take example of your very first love. Aah, that pure, blissful, innocent and goose-bump filled phase. When loving someone only meant loving that person, whole-heartedly and unconditionally. You never thought of where your career would take you, as much as you thought of where, when and how you'll be married to that first love, what you would name your children and how you would grow old with your love. A salary alert on your cellphone that you get now, doesn't give you as much happiness as that very moment when you held your first love's hands, when you hugged tightly for the first time or experienced your first kiss gave you then. It still takes you back there with a smile, doesn't it?
I can see that smile on your face right now and I am going to use ':)' for it.
But now, if you like someone, you'll think a thousand times. Not regarding the possibility of whether that the person will accept or reject you. But instead, you'll think of whether the relationship will work out once committed, if you'll get the time to spend on your love, if your 'space' will not be intruded by that person, if the person will okay with the money you earn, if you get into a relationship, wouldn't it be a burden, a commitment would probably be too much to handle, you don't know if you're too sure of marrying the same person, so why risk it and make things worse. And slowly your career will dominate your heart at this point and will reiterate that finally after a lot of struggle and slogging off your arse, you're settled so don't ruin it for someone else. You think you'll find a someone even better in a few years. When actually, you know you should have followed your instincts. You think the time is not right and that you have other priorities. But eventually you'll realise that the time is never right, you have to risk it. Life has become way too practical. World forces us to be way too realistic. Cynicism dominates Optimism. Superficial life overshadowes fantasies and dreams. Your only dream is to buy a house these days, not who will live with you in it.
And this applies to everything. Doesn't mean you won't give it a shot. You might 'try' working out things that you think you want. But when the foundation of that goal is based on a probability and not determination, pessimism and not confidence, you cannot expect a positive end. You can hope for it, but you know at the back of your mind that it may not work out. And you'll force yourself to deny the fact that this is what you actually wanted. So you're kind of okay with it...
...And within no time again, you'll be back to the hustle-bustle of usual monotony. Because admit it, you really like it. Sigh!
City girl, who is a workaholic and uses all social networks herself.
Don't call me a hypocrite. Call me a slave.